Dad Types #9 Hoarder Dad

Does your dad never throw anything out, just in case? Perhaps his car looks like he’s been dumpster diving? Maybe your Dad takes things from the street because it could be “useful someday”? Does he have a shed/attic/garage/storage unit full of useless crap that he hasn’t touched in years? Basically, is your Dad a Hoarder? Then he will surely find use for these tees.

Symptoms: 

1. He has never thrown anything away ever because he can still use it, someday
2. Has several draws and boxes of old electronics, cellphones, kitchenware – with their corresponding cables
3. These drawers may also contain the following: dead batteries, old mexican pesos, match boxes, dry pens
4. Everything ‘could be’ useful someday – but when asked when – he cannot answer
5. If it’s free it’s his duty to take it
6. His car is full of useful things he found
7. His shed and garage and attic are also full of things he found
8. He has a storage unit somewhere. It is also full of things he found
9. He has collections that other’s may find weird – Collectors are just hoarders with a hobby
10. If told to throw stuff out, he gets upset by the thought of trashing things

Words to live by:

“Another man’s trash is another man’s treasure”

His hobbies include: 

1. Collecting
2. Metal detecting on the beach
3. Flea markets

His ideal gift would be: 

• The most expensive free thing ever (no, it’s not love)